Don't Watch TV



I don't watch tv except for downloading and streaming certain series (currently working my way through Deadwood.)

So, on the rare occasion that I do sit down in front of a television I'm shocked and horrified at the commercials. Almost EVERY ad is belching out lists of our supposed inadequacies! We're too fat (of course,) our eyelashes aren't full and long enough, our skin is wrinkled, our hair is dry, our feet are rough, our eyes are dull, our butts are flat, and these are just the few that I can list off the top of my head. There are ENDLESS drug commercials claiming that normal and slight discomforts warrant medication. And my FAVORITE part is that these medications that cure something silly (seriously Latisse?) tend to cause HEFTY side-effects!

Anyway, not to soap-box it up TOO much (but fuck it, what else is minor internet fame good for? ;P) but I swear that half of the insecurities people have with themselves today are due to commercials. Now, there are plenty of other things shouting at us about our "failings" such as billboards, shopfronts, others attitudes and radio commercials but television just seems SO much more invasive. I sincerely felt like even I, with my strong attitudes about self-worth, was being made slightly more insecure after a few hours of television.

It's nuts. It's ridiculous and crazy.

PLEASE don't let people with an agenda (fucking marketing, they want your money people) sell you poison social attitudes that lead you to hate yourself AND others. Don't treat yourself or other people like shit just because some ingenious marketer is inventing reasons to take your cash. I'll sell you a FREE way to be beautiful. Walk tall, smile and have confidence.

You think shaving my head and flaunting my hairy eyebrows, pits and legs endears me to people? Hell no! When I get admired it's because I'm strutting those hairy eyebrows, pits, legs and shaved head and grinning at the world. I'm grinning at the cool people for making living worthwhile and I'm grinning a big "fuck you" at the assholes of the world. People respect you when you respect yourself. And people love you when you love yourself...

So do it! <3

...

*steps down from her soapbox*

19 comments:

NIckBMorgan said...

Remember, nothing you see on that box is real.


Nothing.

Hegemone said...

Yeah, it's something I picked up on in early highschool. Even if you don't feel confident (who the hell does in highschool?) pretend like you do and no one will know the difference. Eventually, neither will you! :)

Anastasia said...

<3 <3 <3

As a fellow fat and hairy sex goddess, I concur!

Too Old To Be Cool said...

From Jeff Foxworthy:

" 'For itchy, watery eyes, it's Floraflor. Side effects may include: nausea, vomiting, water weight gain, lower back pain, receding hairline, eczema, seborrhea, psoriasis, itchy chafing clothing, liver spots, blood clots, ringworm, excessive body odor, uneven tire wear, pyorrhea, gonorrhea, diarrhea, halitosis, scoliosis, loss of bladder control, hammertoe, the shanks, low sperm count, warped floors, cluttered drawers, hunchback, heart attack, low resale value on your home, feline leukemia, athlete's foot, head lice, club foot, MS, MD, VD, fleas, anxiety, sleeplessness, drowsiness, poor gas mileage, tooth decay, split ends, parvo, warts, unibrow, lazy eye, fruit flies, chest pains, clogged drains, hemorrhoids, dry heaving, and sexual dysfunction.' I'm thinking I'll just stick with itchy, watery eyes!"

Piratestan said...

As the audience dries up, commercials on television get increasingly desperate. We love our DVR, as we can fast-forward through all of those horribly obnoxious commercials. Hell, a lot of the stuff we watch is direct from DVD, so even having to fast-forward through the commercials can be an annoyance!

lenlench4n said...

Well said!

JuneyTwo said...

Brava! *applauds*

Easyryder said...

Well said, you go girl! I've always said, if you've gotta be different, don't try to hide, FLAUNT it!

James D. said...

Maybe it's an American thing... we don't near as many of those commercials up here in Canada (many of the advertising laws are different) and the "this pill/cream/goo will solve all of your problems" commercials that we do get tend to be mainly on the US channels.

I do my best to tune commercials out but every now and then one of them will cut through and I find myself gnashing my teeth or talking back at the TV trying to convince it how stupid it sounds!

Latisse? I had to Google that... Eyelash inadequacies? Seriously people, get over it! Until Madison Avenue starts paying you, don't let them live rent free in your head!

PS: TOTBC had it right with the Jeff Foxworthy quote!

Vera Wylde said...

This is why I virtually never watch anything as it airs, pretty much all that I watch is from recorded DVR so I can fast forward through commercials. What really disturbs me is how often fat is picked on even if the product has nothing to do with weight. I'm waiting for the day when a commercial is just a skinny person screaming at the camera "You fat, fatty, fatso, obese, fatty fat FAT!... Shop at Macy's."

And have you noticed how Brooke Shields is the spokesperson for EVERYTHING?

goteam said...

Your rant is pleasantly reminiscent of Mikhaela Reid's "Your Yucky Body" comics and also multiple Sarah Haskins "Target Women" segments, which I love with the burning intensity of a thousand fiery suns. Which is to say: yay!

When I lived in Laguna, I used to go swimming in part just to revel in being the fattest, hairiest woman visible for miles. I like to think it was a win for everybody involved, with a hint of public service: everybody who was horrified at my "imperfections" got to feel good about looking "better" than me (ha!) and I got to play in the ocean, because I wasn't wearing makeup and jewelry to the frikken beach.

Anonymous said...

On a similar note i attended a friends christening to do the photography. Being polite i decided to stay for the rest of the service (christenings were at the start)

What followed was two hours of pretty much "You're a worthless piece of dirt on god's boot heel" and other various putdowns.

I couldn't help but think afterwards that it was the sort of treatment some people would pay for :P

MoonShadow said...

That's why I pretty much stick to cooking shows, animal stuff and cartoons. Everything else is so damn depressing. >.<

Anonymous said...

<3 Your simply amazing!

Heidi Wilden said...

I love you so much for saying this! I don't think Girls (and guys too) understand, Beauty isn't about how you look, it's how you think and act. I have seen BEAUTIFUL 200 lb women... I will be conceded enough to say I AM one! Because I FEEL beautiful. It shows people! If you LOVE yourself... It will show and you will be more striking then the super models and their dead stares.

Anonymous said...

I never watch TV, either, but for a different reason.

NOTHING on TV interests me in the slightest.

syniqal said...

You'd probably like these print adverts from days of yore: http://19hours-freedom.blogspot.co.uk/2010_08_01_archive.html

I especially like the one encouraging mothers to feed their babies carbonated dissolved cocaine juice. :p

Maren Smith said...

LOL! Nic, I've just discovered your blog and I have to say, your sense of humor is wonderful! This has got to be my favorite comic thus far. Omg, I think I just woke the hubby up laughing!

Anonymous said...

99% of the stuff on TV is crap and you don't get to decide what you want to watch anyway. There's a reason I haven't had a TV in almost a decade.

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